You've Got to Be Kidding!: How to Keep Your Job Without Losing Your Integrity

Two Administrators Hit Their Abusive Bosses Head-On

Here’s what an anonymous respondent to my column from Augusta, Michigan, did. She said she calmly walked into her boss’s office after one of his screaming “spells” and told him, “I am a professional and deserve to be treated accordingly. I would never speak or act in such an unprofessional way to you, and I expect the same courtesy from you. Stop abusing me, or I’ll quit!”

It worked, but only for a short time. Soon enough, his verbal barrage started back up. So, true to her word, this woman started packing her belongings. Alarmed, her boss calmed down and pleaded with her to stay (although he did not apologize). She stayed and he worked on changing his behavior. She reports that while her boss still has an occasional “spell,” it is short-lived because she immediately responds with something like, “We cannot work together in this kind of an environment. We cannot afford any emotional outbursts; we just have too much work to do today. It’s your choice—do we work or not work?” This, of course, causes him to stop immediately. She obviously likes her job, so she chooses to resolve each individual flare-up as it arises. She explained she was “withholding my name for fear of another screaming spell should he read this.” (Some bosses never do grow up.)

Another anonymous respondent writes about having been warned that her new boss had a reputation for going into tantrums every now and then, and was told of his propensity to “carry on disgracefully.” ...