Work Makes Me Nervous: Overcome Anxiety and Build the Confidence to Succeed

Chapter 8. Speak Up: How to Control Your Public Speaking Anxiety

What's not to like about public speaking? How about practically everything? If you are nervous at work, chances are that speaking in public, not just giving speeches or presentations, but being the only one talking in any workplace situation—a meeting, a conference call, a Skype conversation, or around the coffee pot—is stressful for you. Here are just some of the feelings workplace anxiety sufferers have articulated:

"When I'm the only one talking, I feel exposed."

"As soon as I'm through talking, I obsess over whether I've said too much."

"There's nowhere to hide."

"Everyone expects me to say something smart."

"If I make eye contact, I'm afraid my mind will go blank. It's happened before!"

"I'll freak if they see me being nervous!"

There's no denying it, having an audience—even of one or two people—can cause crippling fear and a pervasive sense of nervousness at work. Once your internal critical script starts to run amok, you feel as if you are on the path to embarrassment and shame. You feel you are putting your very identity on the line—that your worth as a person rises or falls with your ability to be perfect. The stakes may indeed be high—your career success is certainly tied to performance. But how well you speak is not an indication of your self-worth. You must separate these dynamics from performance if you want to convert your adrenaline into energy.

That said, you must also use your Adult to accept the reality that ...