Habit 9—Overfamiliarity

The use of inappropriately intimate gestures.

If we habitually insist on a first-name basis or a casual “how are you today, Sam?” with someone we’ve just cold-called, our behavior will come off as out of sync or unnatural. What may be acceptable in one part of a country, such as calling someone “honey” in certain southern states, may be received as offensive in other areas. The use of first names, though intended to establish or demonstrate rapport, can often cause a disconnect when done too soon. Even generational differences can affect the way we come across in our use of formal versus informal terms.

Note that we aren’t referring to another detrimental interpersonal habit: sexual harassment. When we say inappropriately ...

Get What Got You Here Won't Get You There in Sales: How Successful Salespeople Take it to the Next Level now with the O’Reilly learning platform.

O’Reilly members experience books, live events, courses curated by job role, and more from O’Reilly and nearly 200 top publishers.