Chapter 6. What Does Your Body Language Say about You?

Your body language is constantly communicating messages about you, messages that relate to your thoughts, feelings, emotions, attitudes, self confidence, and more. But what exactly are those messages? What nonverbal information are you sending, and how is the information received and interpreted by others?

In this chapter I'll focus on six main categories of what your body language communicates about you:

  1. Status

  2. Dominance

  3. Submission

  4. Uncertainty

  5. Confidence

  6. Personal identity

These categories each describe an overall impression others might form about you based on your nonverbal cues. You will probably recognize something about yourself in each section because everybody cycles through these categories to one degree or another. As you read through the details of each one, take some mental notes about situations where you think you might come across in that particular way. Is it a common occurrence? Is it something you have to consciously choose? Is it something that just seems to happen before you know it?

Once you have greater awareness of what your body language says about you in a variety of circumstances you can begin making deliberate choices about when, where, and how to use different nonverbal behaviors. Think about which behaviors serve you well and choose how to use them more often. Think also about which behaviors are not serving you so well or are even holding you back from your goals, then choose how to change or use them less ...

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