The Rules of Parenting, 3rd Edition

RULE 96

All of your actions speak louder than any of your words

Here’s a Rule that doesn’t only apply in a crisis, but that’s when it becomes hugely important. You know they say kids never listen? Well, it’s not true, but it is true that they take less note of your words than they do of the way you behave. Kids can spot hypocrisy at 100 paces, and they won’t put up with it. They’ll judge you by your actions.

I’m not just talking about negative words and actions. I’ll give you an example. Suppose you have the sense to understand that it’s good to let your emotions out and have a good cry. You can tell your children that as often as you like, but if they see you going through the same trauma and never crying, they’ll find it a lot harder to follow ...