The Bully-Free Workplace: Stop Jerks, Weasels, and Snakes From Killing Your Organization

The Special Case of Women Bullies and Their Women Targets

We want to convey a special warning to women managers. Please fight the urge to torment women subordinates. The media absolutely loved the finding from our 2007 WBI national survey that when the bully was a woman, she chose to target other women in 71 percent of the cases. Well, in 2010, the targeting of women rose to 80 percent (compared with men, who targeted women 46 percent of the time). It was as if only women were bullies. In fact, men still represent the majority (62 percent). However, clips from the film The Devil Wears Prada still depict women's cruelty to other women in the workplace. Woman-on-woman bullying represents 30 percent of all bullying, not even close to a majority, but it has received heightened attention.

We've attempted to understand why the woman-on-woman bullying phenomenon is so prevalent and so noteworthy. Here are some explanations:

A. It's in the workplace where aggression is rewarded. Women see this (if not better than men) and learn to abuse others to get ahead. In male-dominated organizations, where men hold all or most of the executive positions, women tend to adopt male sex types of behavior to survive and succeed. Woman-on-woman bullying belies the popular stereotype of women as less aggressive, more dignified, and more respectful than men. It's counterintuitive.

B. A double standard about women is alive and well and practiced by both men and women. If women are “nice,” they are too soft. ...