The Bully-Free Workplace: Stop Jerks, Weasels, and Snakes From Killing Your Organization

Manager Step 1: Recognize Bullying

Bullying can be theatrical when done in front of an audience, in hallways, and in meetings. The bully is trying to control the emotional tone and can get somewhat histrionic. Tactics include yelling, swearing, screaming, threats, intimidating gestures, and verbal abuse. The perpetrator's goal is to freeze the target into submission with fear. Simultaneously, witnesses are expected to also quiver in fear that they might fall prey next and to do nothing to interrupt the show.

In our book The Bully at Work, we describe the performer as the screaming Mimi. Acts are overt, with motives transparent to even the most inexperienced observer. It would be a funnier show if it were not so harmful. Witnesses, as well as targets, risk being traumatized.

More detective skill is required to discern bullying that happens behind closed doors. Constant critic-type bullies choose private settings to undermine their targets' confidence in their competence. Being out of sight gives the bully a shot at plausible deniability if what transpires ever becomes known through a complaint or lawsuit. The bully can simply deny what was done. And HR uncritically will accept the denial as the credible “other side” of the story. Employment attorneys also defend the bully's actions based on managerial prerogative. What typically happens is that a supervisor new to management decides to attack a veteran accomplished employee. The choice of weapon is a fabricated performance evaluation ...