Super Awesome Introduction!

So, you’ve been forced to get yourself a job. My condolences. I’m not an amazing athlete either, which is why I’m writing this book instead of sitting in a lounge chair beside one of the seven pools at my palatial estate. If I were good at anything other than shuffleboard (which surprisingly doesn’t attract many high-dollar sponsors), then right now I’d be flying my private helicopter to my private island, which would be located in my own private ocean. I would spend my days riding dolphins, and they would make me their king.

Unfortunately, however, that is not the way things turned out for me, and so I have to work, just like you do. And since you have to work, you may as well make it as painless an experience as ...

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