Your purpose is to make your audience see what you saw, hear what you heard, feel what you felt. … Relevant detail, couched in concrete, colorful language, is the best way to recreate the incident as it happened and to picturize it for the audience.
You’ve written a subject line that commands attention because it is simple, truthful, and relevant. Your prospect clicks on your message, hopeful that he’ll read something meaningful but aware that the subject line may be a ruse. He’s ready to delete at a nanosecond’s notice.
You have his attention—build on it. Help him visualize his success. Get him excited with your words! Titillate his senses with sensory, emotion-laden words. Tell brief, ...