Cover Page by Al Switzler, Ron McMillan, Joseph Grenny, Kerry Patterson

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3Describe the Gap

Speak when you are angry

and you will make the best speech

you will ever regret.

—AMBROSE BIERCE

How to Start aCrucial Confrontation

I’M SORRY, BUT MY OSMOSIS IS BROKEN

You’ve picked out a problem, decided to say something, and considered the possible influences behind it; now you are about to take action. Before you do that, let’s be clear. Almost nobody should be harboring the illusion that he or she has been groomed to solve touchy and complicated interpersonal problems. Almost nobody has.

Here’s a typical supervisory training regime. A hardworking and competent employee is tapped on the shoulder on Friday afternoon (“Congratulations, you won the supervisory lottery!”) and promoted to a job that starts Monday morning. ...

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