Creating Success from the Inside Out: Develop The Focus and Strategy To Uncover the Life You Want

Chapter IV. Empowerment versus Victimhood

Sooner or later people caught up in excuses and blame tend to develop a victim mentality. I have known too many people in my life who were terminal victims. "Professional Victims," I call them. I'm not making light of their suffering. Their excuse may be childhood abuse, or losing their job, or discrimination, or a boss or spouse who took them for granted. It's not whether they were actually "done wrong" that matters. What matters is what they do with their life in the face of all their injury and hurt.

I'm not talking about people who occasionally make up some lie about why they are late for work. I'm talking about those who freely blame everyone and everything around them as their excuse for failure. They aren't making up a lie, at least not in their minds. They actually believe that every time something goes wrong in their lives, it is someone else's fault. Or some unknown force like "Lady Luck." In other words, they are always the victim. They are usually unhappy because in their minds—actually, even deeper down inside—they are convinced they are powerless to change things in their lives.

"It's Not My Fault"

Do you have a victim mentality? Do you ever feel as if others are victimizing you, or somehow standing in your way? Could you be a Professional Victim? Let's do a little test. How often have you found yourself saying these phrases?

• It's not my fault.

• I'm just unlucky, I guess.

• I never seem to win.

• If only I'd had ...

• What do you expect? ...