My Listening Barriers

You can begin to improve your listening skills by paying attention to what happens when you communicate and by identifying patterns that get in the way of listening on a deep level. Here’s an example: My major listening block is comparing. When people tell me something that is of particular interest to me—something that I wish I had done or experienced—I have a tendency to start comparing myself to them. My envy button gets pushed: I start wishing I could have figured out a way to have the experience myself, or I start thinking of ways I can make it happen for me. I’m not focused on them; I’m focused on me.

As you become more aware of your own biases and barriers, red flags will begin flying to alert you when you are not ...

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