Be careful how you speak to yourself

Gilbert was interested in why many people using CBT techniques reported that while rationally they were convinced by their alternative thoughts, they often lacked emotional conviction. It was ‘head knowledge’ but it didn’t seem to connect with what they felt inside. What Gilbert discovered was that often such people were using CBT to reason with themselves in quite a harsh, critical or detached way, as if they were blaming themselves for their thinking errors or simply commanding themselves to think differently. Once he persuaded them to start imagining delivering the alternative thoughts in a kind, gentle and soothing tone, many of his subjects reported finding them much more effective. This makes sense in ...

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