Black Belt Negotiating: Become a Master Negotiator Using Powerful Lessons from the Martial Arts

18. Ending the Contest with Respect

Ending a contest must be done with the same forethought and planning as it began.

SENSEI TABUCHI

There is a specific ritual surrounding the ending of a martial arts tournament. Both parties bow to each other as if to say, “You were a worthy opponent.” Then they turn and bow to the referee out of respect. In a match, there will always be a loser, so there will always be hard feelings of one sort or another. But this ritual is a way of wrapping up the proceedings so that everyone involved leaves with the sense of personal dignity, the feeling that the whole event was irreproachable and that is was worthwhile.

Ending a negotiation must be done in a thoughtful way as well—if you want your agreement to stick. ...